THE UNSENT PROJECT: A COLLECTION OF UNSENT TEXT MESSAGES TO FIRST LOVES
Rora Blue started THE UNSENT PROJECT in 2015, Presents the reality of those who have been broken, lost, and forgotten by the people who mean the most to them.
Introduction
A project by THE UNSENT PROJECT presents the reality of those who have been broken, lost, and forgotten by the people who mean the most to them; through the existence of a texting conversation between two lovers who aren’t communicating anymore but without being shared.
Rora Blue started THE UNSENT PROJECT in 2015. Your first love, whether we’re talking about romance or friendships, never really goes away; it stays in your heart forever and manifests itself in different ways throughout the rest of your life. Sometimes, though, it’s hard to express this feeling directly to the person you want to share it.
THE UNSENT PROJECT
I recently found a THE UNSENT PROJECT: a collection of unsent text messages that I had forgotten about years ago. I’ve collected them in one place because they are some of the most important news I’ve ever received, and I thought it would be fun to read through them once again. It’s been three years since I’ve spoken to my first love, Kayla. We dated for three months back in 2016 before things ended, and we went our separate ways. At the time, she was only sixteen while I was nineteen, so we didn’t have any regrets or feelings of ill will towards each other when it ended. Afterward, I moved on with my life and forgot all about her, but now it has been excellent reading through these messages because they remind me of how great we were together despite how short-lived our relationship was.
All it takes is reading a few sentences at a time to take you right back into the past. I’d share the entire conversation if I could, but there are over 150 messages here. Although there are many replies from both of us, the bulk of the content comes from just two days, June 5th and 6th, 2016. If memory serves correctly, it wasn’t until June 6th that we finally saw each other face-to-face after school and kissed and made plans to meet up later that night when her parents weren’t home. But no matter what happens during your subsequent breakup. Whether it’s today or ten years down the road, your memories aren’t going anywhere anytime soon.
THE STORY BEHIND THE UNSENT PROJECT
Every month, for the next year, I’m going to text one of my first loves with an unsent letter from my phone. It will appear in her message feed like a standard text message. But it will be from me to her, and there’s nothing she can do about it. I want them all to go unanswered because the audience must understand that we cannot give each other advice or even platitudes when missing our First Love.
The hope is that some of these texts will fill the blank space between us, but I mostly want to keep trying to get closer. Even if distance separates us, I still care about the people who were once close to me. If there was ever a time for kindness, it is now. Even though the words won’t leave marks on the screens of our phones, maybe they’ll heal something deep inside where scars lay hidden.
Each month you’ll see what’s written on the inside’s letters, which were never sent from hand to hand. Take away the message as you may, but remember the story. And think of your own stories. The only thing separating that little black box from the world is words. We’re lucky enough to have easy access to those words. Let’s not waste the chance we’ve been given. Sometimes it feels so hard just getting started, but there’s always tomorrow morning or lunchtime or today afternoon. You don’t have to let anything hold you back anymore-neither mistakes nor failures nor past regret nor future fear.
What are unsent text messages?
We’ve all sent an I love you to someone that maybe we shouldn’t have. Perhaps it was through text message or Facebook messenger, and there was no way to take it back. Or maybe you were texting with a friend about what you were going to do that weekend, only for them to completely ignore your plans for them and decide not to text you back. They then went on living their life without thinking of you at all. That is an unsent text message. The next, they can’t even tell you if they will hang out next weekend.
Some want to hold onto every word ever exchanged between them and their loved ones but never receive permission from that person, either because said loved one doesn’t want to keep any reminder of rejection in existence or simply doesn’t care anymore. These are moments’ words kept secret so that nobody has to remember being ghosted or rejected. THE UNSENT PROJECT provides people security, knowing they have proof of things once said between them and another individual. It may not be as good as having access to your phone/text messages, but unsent texts may offer more privacy than just deleting everything.
HOW IT STARTED
One afternoon I sat down to write a love letter. A love letter to anyone or anything, but my inspiration came from a boy I saw and how he made me feel. That night, when I went over to his house, I told him what all those beautiful words felt like inside me. The most crucial part is that I wasn’t scared, to be honest with him, and it showed him that even though we hadn’t been together for very long, he had inspired me beyond belief. Since then, all of my loves have created something special within me, and every time they leave me, it’s only suitable that I share those beautiful moments with them, whether they are just friends or not.
Sometimes you never know where things will go; so why not show people how much you appreciate their company in any way possible? Here is where I collect all of my unsent text messages to first loves an outlet for creativity. When writing these text messages, everything that comes out is pure emotion; these are messages that should be sent! Feel free to send them yourself or take advice from these THE UNSENT PROJECT as ideas on how to express your feelings without fear into a creative form other than a simple sentence. Everyone has been there before falling in love, heartbreaks, and frustrations but there is always hope for tomorrow.
MY EXPERIENCE WITH THE PROJECT
In the fall of 2011, I came across a creative writing exercise in which one wrote an unsent text message to a past love. In the days that followed, I was compelled to revisit that experience and write a series of unsent texts to people who had played significant roles in my life: family members, childhood friends, college classmates, and ex-lovers. It was cathartic for me and somewhat therapeutic. But, as it turns out, the result isn’t all that unique; it’s hard not to find yourself relating to these messages whether you’ve been there or not. Thus, The Unsent Project was born.
WHAT WAS LEFT OUT
I would’ve sent the unsent text messages to my exes if we were still friends after we broke up. THE UNSENT PROJECT includes a mix of funny and severe thoughts, from a childlike desire to tell them what I’ve been up to since and how much I miss them to more bitter sentiments about things they did or didn’t do for me. While writing these texts, I realized that many of them could also serve as public service announcements; helping other young women in similar situations avoid mistakes and heartbreak when dealing with their exes. The possibilities were endless, so let me share a few examples of what they could look like. Most people don’t appreciate it when you hide your relationship on social media until you break up.
Nobody likes finding out someone they thought was single is dating someone else. So, stop stringing him along by saying you want a serious relationship if all you plan on doing is keeping him as your backup plan. You can delete him from your Instagram now; he doesn’t need to see that photo of you and your sister at brunch together.
WHAT HAS BEEN LEARNED
THE UNSENT PROJECT started as an experiment that a friend of mine and I decided to participate in. It was meant to help us create art from our shared experience and perspective. In addition, we were interested in humanizing stories that generally get pushed aside when boiled down to statistics. The long-term goal is to create a book that includes other people’s unsent text messages.
The idea is: if you can be honest about something so intimate; then maybe we can make other aspects of life more open and straightforward too. You are invited to submit your THE UNSENT PROJECT here or via email with your consent for publication consideration to email protected.
Why Write THE UNSENT PROJECT Letters?
Writing THE UNSENT PROJECT to your first love is a fun way to reminisce about past relationships; learn from those memories. You can explore what you might have done differently and understand what lessons you may have learned due to that relationship ending. Writing THE UNSENT PROJECT letters to your first love is also an excellent way to reflect on yourself during that time in your life.
We look at our lives through another person’s experience and try to make sense of it all. When writing an unsent letter to your first love; consider reading more books or revisiting places where important moments took place between you two. Some ways I suggest finding closure by writing letters are: Trying something new such as skydiving or bungee jumping; but if that doesn’t seem appealing, creating something like scrapbooking or jewelry making could be a great option.
It’ll allow you to think back while creating something beautiful, giving more meaning to each step along the way. More importantly, though, write with intent. Write every day for 30 days, whether it’s one sentence or three pages long, get everything out in its entirety. Finally, once you’ve created your finished product, go ahead and share it with your first love. They deserve to see how you’ve grown up over time, even if it wasn’t together. Sharing it will help them move forward, too, and hopefully give closure as well. In addition, try not to hold onto any anger or resentment toward them for breaking up with you. Keep in mind that no matter how hard someone tries to keep their heart safe; there are times when we need to let go so that someone else can find us again.
The Unsent Project goes viral on TikTok
TikTok is by far my favorite social media app right now. This app allows you to post 15-second videos with accompanying music. While it seems simple, they have really mastered their style and branding with TikTok. The Unsent Project was one of three featured Creators on TikTok. It was also my first time using a celebrity in a video! I created a series of unsent text messages to first loves/crushes; that you could send via TikTok, it went viral, amassing over 100K views in 24 hours.
It was cool because I used an actual crush of mine as inspiration for a lot of these letters. So seeing him receive them made me feel like a million bucks. Unfortunately, when people use their real name or username on social media apps, there isn’t any way to protect yourself from creeps who might make your inbox look like notifications from Starbucks.
CONCLUSION
When I was thirteen, I had my first love. It was a secret relationship with a girl two years older than me. Looking back on it now, we both seemed utterly obsessed with each other more in love than we should have been at such a young age. I live on the West Coast and work as an editor. Suppose we hadn’t let people influence us into thinking that everyone else was doing it too.
